Basic training: involving grieving children in grief, farewell and funerals
Professional training for professionals who want to make a difference
Why this child grief training?
Children have a right to say goodbye. Yet they are often excluded from the funeral process – not out of ill will, but out of ignorance. Parents don’t know how to involve their child. Most professionals don’t dare to advise, for fear of making the wrong choice.
The result? Children who are still struggling years later with a farewell they missed. Families who afterwards regret decisions they made under pressure. And funeral directors who let opportunities slip to add real value in a family’s hardest week.
This basic child grief training gives you the knowledge and confidence to support grieving children professionally during the funeral.
How does this training work?
This one-day course is built on a proven didactic model, developed by child grief expert Richard Hattink. Instead of theoretical background, you get concrete tools for your daily practice in involving children in the funeral.
The method:
- Loss Triangle analysis: Understand the impact on the family in 3 steps
- Dosing with the 3-step plan: Communicate with children honestly, within limits and repeatedly
- Practical involvement: From decorating the coffin to a spade of earth – what is possible and what is necessary
- Recognising pitfalls: The 5 ways in which you unintentionally exclude children
Working methods:
Case studies from practice
Group discussion on moral dilemmas
A concrete checklist for every conversation
No PowerPoint marathon, but active learning with fellow participants who recognise the same challenges. This training fits the reality of everyday practice.
What do you get?
Training: Involving grieving children in the funeral week
Duration: 1 day
Location: In-company, or as an open training (next date: Friday 19 February 2027, Castricum)
Programme
Block 1: Basic attitude & first contact
The Loss Triangle: Impact, Coping, Support
The 3 P’s: Pedagogically sensitive, Presence, Practical
Understanding the order of phone calls (who calls whom first, and why?)
The first conversation with parents about children
Block 2: Dosing & involving
The 3-step plan for breaking bad news
Attention span by age (and what that means for an average funeral)
Concrete ways to involve children: before, during and after the funeral
What works and what doesn’t: practical do’s and don’ts
Block 3: Practice & pitfalls
Moral dilemmas in practice (a mother doesn’t want the child to come, the child wants to see the body)
The 5 pitfalls (victimisation): avoiding, distancing, sparing, accusing, brainwashing
Play behaviour of grieving children (why it is normal and healthy)
Checklist for every contact with a family with children
What you take home
✓ Loss Triangle model to quickly analyse the family situation
✓ Attention span table by age
✓ 3-step plan for communicating honestly with children
✓ Concrete checklist for every conversation with parents
✓ List of ways to involve children
✓ Recognising the 5 pitfalls
After this training you can
Quickly assess the impact of a loss on a family
Advise parents on involving children in the funeral
Dose information in a way that fits the child’s development
Offer concrete options without overriding the parent
Recognise moral dilemmas and make them discussable
Understand and facilitate the play behaviour of grieving children
This training contributes to your professional development and gives you tools for pedagogical support during funerals involving children.
Investment
Open training: € 250 per person, incl. VAT and lunch, without PE points.
In-company: price on request, depending on group size, location and customisation wishes.
Want more depth?
After this basic training you can move on to the Advanced Programme: a 3-day in-depth training with certification and ongoing support.
More information: www.kc-ToThePoint.com/diepgang-kbu
Prefer to get oriented online first?
Take a look at the online course Involving children in grief, funerals and loss — at your own pace, no travel time.
About the trainer
Richard Hattink has worked with grieving children since 1999. He holds a master’s degree in Pedagogy on this subject, taught in both special secondary education and higher professional education, and through BijDeHand has guided terminally ill parents with young children and their families.
As founder of the ToThePoint Knowledge Centre he spreads knowledge about child grief in the Netherlands, Germany, Austria, Switzerland and many more countries across Europe. He developed funeral toys to make it easy to talk to children about death.
Approach: To the point, 100% accurate answers, scientifically grounded. No waffle, but depth where it matters.
Sign up or more information?
ToThePoint Knowledge Centre
E: info@kc-tothepoint.com
W: www.kc-ToThePoint.com
Or get in touch directly for a no-obligation conversation about the possibilities for your funeral centre.
Frequently asked questions
Is this training also suitable for funeral professionals without a pedagogical background?
Yes. The training assumes you are not a pedagogue. You learn tools that fit your role.
How many participants can take part?
A minimum of 6 and a maximum of 16 participants. With larger groups, the quality of the interaction suffers.
Will I receive a certificate?
You receive a certificate of attendance. A full certificate is only available after the 3-day Advanced Programme.
Can this training be delivered in-company at our location?
Yes, that is actually the preference. Training at your own location lowers the threshold for bringing colleagues along and reduces travel time. An in-company training is offered as a full day. More case material is then added.
Is there also an open training?
Yes. Besides in-company, we offer the basic training as an open training, for € 250 per person, incl. VAT and lunch, without PE points. A minimum of 6 and a maximum of 16 participants; with fewer than six the case work doesn’t function and the day will not go ahead. The next date is 19 February 2027 in Castricum. If that date doesn’t suit you, leave your details at the bottom of this page and you will hear from us as soon as a new date is known.
The next training with open registration will be held on 19 February 2027 in Castricum. Sign up now